Do you do Love? Do you do Laugh?
Love is not an action; it cannot be enforced by will. Love simply happens. And the same can be said for real laughter.
We often keep the best things for ourselves and our inner circle – friends and family. The best things are not only the material possessions, but more importantly our opinions. We reserve the best opinions for ourselves and the family; “we are the Good people”. Everyone else, outside this closely guarded trusted circle, cannot be trusted.
Dont blame yourself for being closed, for being selfish, for its natural. When was the last time you smiled at another stranger? A smile is completely free, and yet we find it so hard to give!
Start by Observing your Mind
When I first started to observe my mind, I was surprised how quickly I come to judge people I have just met. Within a few seconds, even if the other person has yet to speak, my mind would quickly take in the way the person dresses, the way the person walks etc and come to a definite conclusion about the person.
How ridiculously quick and definite the mind judges! The moment judgment starts, we start reacting to this conceived notion of the other person. It is akin to a person running away from a rope which he thought is a snake.
If we see a person speaking to thin air, we would say ‘This is a mad person, he is seeing someone who does not exist’. However, if we only realise what our minds are doing, it is always creating mental images of others, and we are constantly reacting to these mental images. It is plain madness.
My teacher always asked, whenever we start to come to conclusions about someone else. “Do you know his life story?”, “Do you know what are his biggest happiness and sorrows?”, “Do you know what keeps him awake at night?” If we do not even know ourselves, how can we claim to know another person? If we do not know the other, in what position are we to judge?
Where there is Judgment, Love cannot exist
Where there is judgment about someone else, whether positive or negative, we are preventing ourselves from fully experiencing the other person. Judgments are always limiting, and partial. Love on the other hand, is limitless. It is full acceptance; it is without expectations and it is the other way we can fully experience another person.
To survive, our minds have become accustomed to judging so that we can quickly discern if we should stay, fight or flee. While this discerning part of the mind is critical, we have become so over reliant on it, that we have created a personal reality of who we are, and how every single person is in our mind. We trust it so much, that we refuse to modify or even relook at this personal reality. This self created reality is ‘an eternal truth’.
That is why when situations happened that cannot be explained by this personal reality, we get stressed. We get anxious because we feel like we are losing control. We need to realise how much destruction this judgmental part of the mind can cause. We need to learn how to control our mind. We need to learn how to break our mental boundaries, and just accept.
Our true nature is Love. Pure love with no expectations, no limits. It is time we learn how to return to our true nature, how to love and be Love.